October 3, 2025
 

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This month we feature Part 2 of Is Cohabitation a Good Way to Prepare for Marriage?. 

Is Cohabitation a Good Way to Prepare for Marriage?  Part 2

   Chapter 2 of the Unification Principle is The Human Fall.  Since God created this beautiful ideal of the family, what went wrong?  We know there is this being called Satan, the perpetrator of evil, but where did Satan come from; what was the root of sin?  What is the fall of man?  Christians traditionally say it is some kind of vague fruit, but the Unification Principle says that it is clearly a symbolic fruit, not the fruit of an actual tree.  What would be so tempting that Adam and Eve would be tempted to fall?  Just an apple?  They had plenty to eat.

    We have a clue.  After they ate this fruit they covered their lower parts, indicating that this was a sexual sin.  You can learn the details by studying The Fall of Man here.
    The Fall of Man had to do with perfected Adam, symbolized by the tree of life, and Eve, symbolized by the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  It was not just a snake which tempted them.  This snake was symbolic of a spiritual being, because this snake conversed with Adam and Eve.  It knew the will of God.  It caused the human fall.  The angel fell as a result of an illicit sexual relationship.  Jesus said in John 8:44 "You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father's desires."  How could the devil be our father?  The only way that can be true is if there is some kind of blood relationship. Human beings are the descendants of Satan, the ancient serpent who tempted human beings.

Two excellent resources are UrbanLifeTraining.org and UnionStation.love.  Urban Life Training raises youth leaders to model and teach about the benefits of sexual abstinence, in preparation for marriage and successful family formation.  This mission is carried out by local chapters.  You can form a chapter in your own area.  You can also become a member of Urban Life Training as a school, a parent, or an individual and gain access to all of the great materials at urbanlifetraining.org.
    These materials include Relationship Intelligence slides, videos, activities, video clips for discussion, peer counseling video clips and scripts, presenter training recordings, the STAR Interfaith Leadership Training 10 week program and much more.  These are all include in your membership for just $49 per year.

    Check out the many article and newsletters at Urban Life Training, too, such as Eight Facts about Forced Vaccination in West Virginia. Find out how you can form a Chapter in your local community, or if you are a college student, on your college campus.  Check out back issues of this newsletter, too.

Our sister site is UnionStation.love, the site for finding your eternal match. Be the One.  Find the One.  Those who are abstinent before marriage can find their eternal match.  You will be able to learn from the Blessing Preparation Course and prepare to become a Blessed family.  This is for those who are either sexually abstinent or who have returned to sexual abstinence.  This is a purpose driven and purposeful way to find your eternal match.  All candidates are verified, they are real people; there are no fake profiles.  You will have a meaningful process geared toward finding your eternal match.

   In conclusion, is cohabitation a good way to prepare for marriage?  The answer is a resounding "No".  Don't do it.  If you are cohabiting and you are serious about getting married, then move out.  The only exception that I would suggest is that if you already have children, you effectively are a married couple. In that case, you can apply for our Blessing Preparation Course.  You will at some point go through a period of 40 days of sexual abstinence with your mate.  Then you can become a Blessed couple. And, of course, you should get legally married as part of that whole process.  In general, though, if you don't have children, I would highly urge you to move out.  If that breaks your relationship, so be it.  It wasn't a very good one anyway.
   

It is the most mind bending thing when so many people think it is good to live together when it is absolutely not a good thing to live together without marriage.
    Urban Life Training emphasizes the success formula for youth of graduating from high school, not having children until you are married and at least 21 years old, and getting a full time job. If you follow all of these rules, there is a two percent chance that your family will live in poverty.  If you don't follow any of these rules, there is an 74 percent chance that your family will live in poverty.  It's really simple, but our whole society is emphasizing the wrong thing.  Finding your eternal match is really about you preparing yourself.  It will help a lot if you take some practical steps, like joining UnionStation.love and practicing abstinence yourself, or returning to abstinence.

Is Cohabitation a Good Way to Prepare for Marriage?  Part 1

    An estimated 70% of couples today will cohabit before marrying. Is this a good idea?  As pointed out in an article by Brad Wilcox and Alysse ElHage, Taylor Swift and her boyfriend Joe Alwyn broke up after six years of living together.  Living together before marriage does not help you odds of having a successful marriage.  In fact, it hurts your odds of having a successful marriage.

    Fifty percent of white evangelicals believe that cohabitation is morally acceptable if a couple plans to marry, according to Pew research!  A lot of people think that you should 'try before you buy'.  People who would consider themselves 'well educated' still think that they should cohabit before marriage.  In fact, jointly committed love is the foundation for a good marriage, and for many cohabiting couples, this is lacking.  Cohabiting increases your chance of divorce from 20% to 25%.  There is very little taboo now about living with someone before marriage and practicing sex outside of marriage.  And that really is a shame.
    Pastors, parents and schools should emphasize that cohabiting is a bad idea, and that it does not work toward building a stable marriage.  Steve Harvey, the radio and television personality has had three marriages.  But what is he telling his own daughters?  He is telling them to get married first, based on his own experiences in cohabiting.  Maybe Taylor Swift will give her own daughters and sons the same advice in the future; get married first before having sex, we hope.

    Let's now look at a more internal perspective on why not to have sex before marriage.  In this show (The Richard Urban Show) we emphasize the Unification Principle point of view.  Paramount is that we follow God's plan for marriage.  Anyone who created themselves, please raise your hand!  You were 'created' by your parents, but really, you are created by God, working through the sexual union of your parents.  In Genesis 1:28, we are told to 'be fruitful, multiply and have dominion over creation'.  To be fruitful means to unite your mind and body, centered on God to become a perfected individual.  In light of this direction from God, at the sister site to Urban Life Training, UnionStation.love the motto is "Be the one to find the one". 

    The current environment of dating sites has allowed psychopathic men to take advantage of women, who are the biggest losers in this culture of hook-up. God's first blessing is individual perfection, and sexual abstinence before marriage is a big part of that.  The second blessing is family perfection; a God-centered family consisting of a God-centered husband, wife and children.  In the Unification Principle this is called the four-position foundation.  A family or society that has formed the four-position foundation in line with God's ideal is patterned after the image of a perfect individual.  It this becomes the substantial object partner to the individual who lives in oneness with God, and consequently, it also becomes the substantial object partner to God.
    The third blessing is the perfection of a human being's dominion over the natural world; to fulfill this blessing, human beings and the natural world should become completely one, thereby establishing a God-centered four-position foundation of dominion.  By fulfilling the three great blessings, we return joy to God. 

Watch Is Cohabitation a Good Way to Prepare for Marriage?

Listen to Is Cohabitation a Good Way to Prepare for Marriage?  

Stop the Decimation of Our Youth, Part 1

All kinds of corruption in our society stem from the fall of man and from sexual corruption, which is related to the fall of man.

Basically, all kinds of corruption stem from that and all kinds of decline stem from the decline of the family, the male, female, biological family of a married husband and wife and children, which now only 40% of youth are born within a married family.  At our website, visionroot.org, you can study the Unification Principle.

But that doesn't tell the whole story because the numbers are much higher: 68% in the black community and higher also in the Hispanic community. So that really needs to be dwelled on, and you don't really hear about that. In fact, you even hear the opposite.  An example is that Elon Musk had 13 or 14 children from four different women.

I know he was married before and had six children, but nonetheless, that's hardly an ideal situation. We need to guide our youth to abstain before marriage. So let's look at a couple of articles to get some facts on this issue here. We have an article by Stephanie Mann of SafeKidsNow.com on her website, Let's Expose the Jackass Generation.

What she's saying is that the Z generation often has a lack of understanding.

Here are some quotes from Stephanie Mann’s excellent article:

We have the jackass generation, which split away from mainstream Americans. These people with inflated egos blame others, have all the answers and don't listen to other points of view.

Younger people lack a conscience as they loot, steal and shoot other people and commit criminal acts of violence against anyone who happens to be in their way. The jackass generation includes politicians and leaders who reject consequences for evil behavior. We need to start a media conversation on how to strengthen and support American families and neighbors with limited involvement of the police. Community responsibility for neighborhood safety can dramatically reduce crime, drugs, and violence and build trust as neighbors work together to keep families and children safe. Neighborhood involvement exposes crime, agency and police corruption. We, the people need to stop assuming that politicians and taxpayers money can save us in a democracy involves citizens create positive change in our communities.

The limited job of politicians is to write and pass laws as they spend taxpayers’ money, which often leads to corruption. “Integrity, transparency in the fight against corruption have to be part of the culture. They have to be thought of as fundamental values”. Angel Gurria. OECD, Secretary General, Transparency International.

Bureaucrats seek to divide and control people's behavior. They use “woke” intimidation to reduce freedom of speech and downplay the role of religion because people of faith don't trust big government. When we trust our higher power, we can discover our inner ability to find solutions. That was the success of the greatest generation during World War II.
 
Two, the jackass generation is wagging the donkey. The question is, what are we the people willing to do to stop power hungry politicians from assuming control over freedom-loving Americans?

Read the full article here.

Here are several quotes from  Marriage Isn't Just a Piece of Paper.

Even as the American marriage rate has steadily declined, the cohabitation rate has steadily grown. According to 2019 Pew research study, more Americans have cohabited at some point than have married.

15 times more couples lived together outside marriage today than in 1960. In truth, cohabitation is a disastrous way to form a household ion x Pro-life Author Lila Rose highlights the facts about shacking up. According to research, couples who cohabitate before marriage are 48% more likely to divorce.
Cohabitation doesn't set you up for success. It undermines the success of your marriage. So, for those who are dating and in a relationship, build a strong foundation by growing together spiritually, intellectually, and emotionally. If this is the person God is calling you to marry, make the commitment first, get married, then build your home together.

Brad Wilcox is with the Institute for Family Studies. He reaffirmed that. He says, my students, who are at the University of Virginia, think cohabitation is a great way to prepare for marriage. But cohabitation is actually linked to marital failure. A Stanford study found that cohabiting with an extra partner boosted women's odds of divorce by three times.

Cohabitation fails to prepare people for marriage because it's fundamentally unlike marriage. As Wilcox explained, cohabitation caused partners to adopt a less committed view of marriage, and this low commitment mentality makes them more vulnerable to marital dissolution.
Read the full article here.

When times get tough with our youth, being decimated by all kinds of indoctrination, throughout society and especially in public schools, is incumbent upon us as responsible citizens, parents, and people who care that we stop this decimation.

The decimation is because of the attack on the fundamental institution of the family. That means a man and a woman and children.   The fact that the definition of what a family is would even be in question is basically insane.

Is a family two men or two women living together?  No, I don't think so. That's not the way that God created the family. So what can we do about this? I'm into practical solutions and in 2003, my wife and I founded Urban Life Training. The full name is Urban Life Training & Reality Assessment Teen Choice. Or Ultra Teen Choice, which we call Urban Life Training for short.

Urban Life Training is a program to help you succeed. The program helps youth by helping them be role models, who teach about the importance of developing good character and abstaining from sex before marriage to the younger students. It's basically a no-brainer. And we've had great success, working in about a dozen different elementary, middle and high schools in Washington DC and nearby areas.

Stop the Decimation of Our Youth-Part 2

Here you can find out about the Urban Life Training Program. Read below for Part 1, featured in the June Urban Life Training Enews.






We highly encourage you to form a Chapter of Urban Life Training in your local area.  Apply to be a Chapter here.  

This is the formula for how we are helping youth and stopping them from being decimated.  We have to teach them the importance of the "success formula".  The success formula is to:
1) Graduate from High School
2) Wait until age 21 and married before having children.
3) Get a full time job
NNote:  I would add, if you want to be a stay at home mom, and your husband is employed, that definitely counts, too!

But many schools are facilitating gender indoctrination, where, according to YRBSS(Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System), 38 percent of high school girls identify as gay or lesbian, bisexual or other/questioning!  This is the biggest crisis in society.  Other things that are political are constantly going on, especially around corruption centering on misuse of funds.  The real action centers on the family issue.  BR>For instance, why aren't many men working?  There are many related issues, but arguably the biggest one is that if you don't grow up with a mom and dad setting an example, you get off on to other paths of life.

AAs we mentioned in Part 1 of this article, most youth don't know that if they want to be successful in life and relationships, they should not be cohabiting, and they don't know about the success formula.  By forming an Urban Life Training Chapter in your local area you can give out the message to youth that they must have.  It is a type of child abuse to not give youth this type of life-saving information.  People with other agendas are coming in, such as in Montgomery County, Md., but also many other places, and literally giving Kindergarten students transgender indoctrination.  Let's help all of our youth be successful!

Form a Chapter of Urban Life Training in your local community, and you can provide these services for schools that want them.BR>
A sister site to Urban Life Training is UnionStation.love, a place where verified members who are staying abstinent or have returned to sexual abstinence before marriage are there.  If you want to try a different approach, check out UnionStation.love.

Urban Life Training provides a successful and proven approach to guiding youth toward a successful life through abstaining from sex before marriage.  In 1000 plus school districts, children can tell someone at school, such as the counselor, that they think they are something other than their actual gender, and that counselor will not tell you, as a parent.
 

Stop the Decimation of Our Youth 

Watch the Richard Urban Show Podcast of Stop the Decimation of Our Youth

LListen to the Richard Urban Show Podcast of Stop the Decimation of Our Youth

Form a Chapter of Urban Life Training/FONT>

Are you telling your children to abstain from sex before marriage?  Abstinence before marriage is the most crucial part of the success formula for your child's life. 
Gain access to videos, testimonies, slide presentations, a Celebration of Purity script and much more by joining Urban Life Training
 

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